Telling
someone about your eating disorder is one of the most difficult and most
important steps to take when dealing with an eating disorder and deciding to get
help. Most sufferers are embarrassed and ashamed about their messed up eating
behaviours and beliefs. Oftentimes they feel disgusted about themselves because
of what they are doing. It is really difficult for someone with an eating disorder
to open up to someone who doesn't know what it is like to have this illness. It
can take weeks and even months till they are ready to share their story with someone
else. They are afraid of being rejected, not understood and left alone again.
Telling
someone about what you are going through is something very important and very
brave to do. Myself, it took me months before I was able to tell someone about
my daily struggles with an eating disorder. I was so afraid of being rejected
and was constantly asking myself:
"How will they react?"
"What will they say?" "Will they understand me?" "Will
they think I am crazy?" "Will they be mad at me?" "Will
they stop wanting to have something to do with me?" "Will they leave
me alone?"
Talk to a person
you can trust and feel comfortable talking with - family members, friends, teachers,
local eating disorders support groups, doctors, counselors or any other specialist
who is trained to help people who are suffering with an eating disorder.
"Somehow
I want my family to find out so I can get help. I do need help... I throw up at
least once a day. I know I need help but I don't know where to go. I know I can't
do it on my own."
Before
we tell someone about what is going on with us, we spend days and weeks trying
to figure out how the other person is going to react to our 'confession'. Unfortunately,
it is impossible to say how that person is going to react and the only way we
are ever going to find out is with taking the chance and sharing our story with
them.
The reaction.... the person may be surprised, shocked,
worried, upset, start to cry, or may be releaved that you are finally opening
up to them because they have already picked up the signs and know what is going
on with you. Or maybe the person does not know what to say, how to respond and
may not say anything and may not even know anything about eating disorders.
A very good idea is to bring some information
about eating disorders to give to that person you are about to open up to. That
way they can educate themselves a bit about your problem and learn about how to
best support you.
Maybe the person needs some time to digest
the information you have been given to them. After a couple of days they may be
ready to sit down again with you and talk about your problem in more detail. By
then, they probably have already gotten quite a bit educated about your situation
and the both of you can begin to talk about your options and possibilities.
