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Trying To Look Like Jennifer Aniston
Nearly Killed Me
An obsession with looking like the Friends
star
led Rose Sadowski into a long, desperate battle
against the deadly eating disorders anorexia and bulimia.
A YOUNG anorexic has told how her obsession
with Friends actress Jennifer Aniston almost killed her.
Rose Sadowski, 21, grew up desperate to be thin
and suffered anorexia and bulimia nervosa in her teens.
Now recovered, the drama student is determined
to help others and is heading to the House of Commons to highlight
her campaign.
Rose said: "You shouldn't suffer in silence.
Eating disorders have been a taboo subject for too long.
"There is no shame in it - it is an illness
and, above all, it is not your fault. I want to use my experience
to help other sufferers avoid the cruelties of an eating disorder."
At one point, 5ft 8in Rose was down to just
over five stone and so weak she struggled to get out of bed.
Doctors told her if she didn't start eating
again she'd die, as her vital organs were struggling to function.
Latest statistics reveal there's been a huge
rise in cases like Rose's, with as many as one in 60 Scots
suffering from an eating disorder.
And her demise shows just how devastating the
disease can be.
Rose, of Edinburgh, was 14 and weighed a healthy
10 stone when her problems with eating began - and she admits
that telly stars' slim figures deepened her obsession.
Rose explained: "I was passionate about dancing
and my big dream was making it on the West End stage.
"But when I looked around my dance class, all
the other girls seemed to have beautiful bodies. I was definitely
the biggest.
"I was a Friends fan too but, as every series
went by, the female stars like Jennifer Aniston seemed to
get thinner "I wanted to be thin like them and started getting
obsessed by self image. I began to diet."
At first, Rose just tried to eat healthily but
before long was starving herself and then bingeing.
Then a pal revealed how she could pig out and
stay slim. Suddenly, disappearing to the toilet to be sick
made perfect sense.
Rose revealed: "I tried it and it started to
work. The weight began falling off and slowly it became my
crutch.
"Every time I was stressed, I'd go for food,
then vomit." Rose was prescribed anti -depressants and started
seeing a counsellor after her mum Frances marched her to see
a GP.
But the stress of studying for exams meant the
eating disorder worsened. Rose said: "It was a never-ending
cycle. I'd starve all day, binge in the evenings, vomit, and
then the cycle would happen all over again.
"I was tired constantly, falling asleep in class,
my hands and knuckles were raw from where I'd made myself
sick and my throat was cut to shreds."
By July 2002, Rose was dangerously weak and
she admits: "Anorexia had won.
"At weekly weigh-ins, I'd hide stones in my
pockets and drink pints of water to fool doctors into believing
I was gaining weight."
Rose realised how ill she was while touring
America with friends and hit rock bottom on her first term
away from home at university.
But, even while being forced to wear children's
clothes because she was so thin, she was still too scared
to reveal her illness.
After an emotional Christmas at home, when Frances
expressed her worst fears, Rose pleaded with her GP for help.
And a referral to psychiatrist Dr Fiona Morrison at the Royal
Edinburgh Hospital proved a turning point.
Rose said: "I'd never felt so lucky. I believe
she really made me begin the slow road to recovery."
Sharing her secret with her friends was also
a fantastic release.
Rose explained: "I just couldn't handle the
stress any more and broke down in front of them.
Until then I'd been so out of touch with my
emotions and unable to cry.
"They were mortified. But they stood by me every
step of the way and I realised I had too much to live for
to let anorexia beat me."
Slowly, Rose started putting on weight. Winning
the lead part in an Edinburgh Fringe play last year was a
milestone - as was her psychiatrist telling her she no longer
needed to see her.
Rose now weighs seven-and-a-half stone.That's
still underweight but she eats three healthy meals a day and
no longer vomits.
She said: "I fill my jeans for the first time.
And I'm starting to get curves I'm proud of. I'm no longer
scared of food."
After graduating, Rose, who is to tell her story
on GMTV, wants to train as a drama therapist.
She's still cautious about food and may never
have a normal attitude to her diet.
But, speaking ahead of her trip to the Commons
on Monday, Rose said: "Life is there for the taking and I'm
standing up and reaching out with both hands.
There is so much waiting for me.
If I can get the message out that there is a
way back from an eating disorder, then this will be worthwhile.
"Hopefully one day we'll have a world where
eating disorders no longer damage promising young lives."
"For now, we can ensure those who suffer
get the help they need."
The Eating Disorders Association can be contacted
on 0845 634 1414.
If you are under 18, call 0845 634 7650.
'I'd starve all day, binge in the evenings,
vomit, and then the cycle would happen all over again'
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About the Author:
Lisa Adams - 4th of February 2006
Article Source: http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk
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