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Overcoming Anorexia: My Story
by Alyson Boim
When you learn about eating disorders in Jr.
High or in health class you learn that they are life threatening
and that you can "never recover." I would like to emphasize
that, while the former can be quite true, the latter is not!
I don't know if I realized that as I suffered from it myself,
but I must've known somehow, as I kept trying. If you have
a disease like an eating disorder, there may not be pills
to cure you, but within your own personal desire and hard
work, and along with the people around you, lies your cure;
recovery may not be cut and dry, but it is possible. You
can fully recover from an eating disorder.
I was in and out of the hospital with different
ailments
Can you imagine having a disease that has no
cure, from which you will suffer for the rest of your life?
one which affects you both physically and emotionally and
affects everything you do and everyone with whom you interact?
What a terrible prognosis! Again, you can fully recover from
an eating disorder. This is the message I bring to people
who have an eating disorder and those who have concerns about
them. Even when the inner battle seems too difficult and an
end doesn't even appear, it will.
Low immunity
When I was in and out of the hospital with different
ailments that were the result of a very low immune system,
when my 85 pounds could not support my 5'6" frame, it seemed
that an end might not be possible. Even at twice that weight,
though, I wasn't going to die of heart failure, I still felt
failure within. When I faced numerous therapists and even
eating disorder group therapies, I still could not envision
hope or help. It wasn't until I found the right kind of therapy
that I realized that the girls who did not want to recover
whom I had encountered in those eating disorder groups were
not what I wanted to be. Something turned around inside of
me—not all at once, but in slow and gradual steps.
Now, when I think back to who I was (and it
wasn't the person I am now, by any means) I am thankful to
my friends who stuck by me, my family, and to Abbie. I am
incredibly proud of who I am and what I've become, of the
progress I've made, and of how I've left those eating disordered
months and years so far behind. The eating disordered ways,
the behaviors and the thinking never linger, not even for
a fleeting thought or a moment.
Finding balance
Before and during the eating disorder, I had
been a competitive runner, a prize winner for my school and
renown in my state. I had to leave my running behind for many
years during and following my recovery. As long as it was
part of the eating disorder, I had to keep the sport I loved
at bay. At times, I tried to go back to it and could not,
recognizing that I couldn't run and be healthy. Finally, as
I grew healthier, I learned to be able to balance it all.
I have completed 3 marathons lately and, while I would not
have done it if I felt the pernicious control of the eating
disorder creeping back, I was finally able to run them in
a healthy way, to go back to the sport I love in a new way,
completely apart from the eating disorder. I think this is
how I really knew that I was fully recovered.
I want to shout out and tell the world that
you can recover. Please, please remember: You can fully
recover from an eating disorder! Don't lose sight of that.
Thanks for the Support
Thank you Abbie, Mom, Jimmy and Ben, Nana and
Kristin- my biggest supporters throughout. And thank you to
those who stayed around to support me throughout. When Abbie
said, early on, that someone with an eating disorder isn't
capable of giving love to anyone else because of being consumed
emotionally by the disorder and the depression and obsessions
that go with it, I knew I wanted out. I have too much love
to give to be someone who cannot give it. Though I lost some
wonderful people along the way, I also gained closer relationships
with those who stayed by me throughout the recovery. Best
of all, I re-found myself. I know who I am and I love whom
I have become. I have my life back. Thank you so much to them
all!
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Psychotherapist Abigail H. Natenshon has
specialized in the treatment of eating disorders with individuals,
families, and groups for the past 31years. She is the author
of When Your Child Has An Eating Disorder, A Step-by-Step
Workbook For Parents And Other Caregivers, Jossey-Bass,
1999. Based on hundreds of successful outcomes, this book
shepherds concerned parents step-by-step through the processes
of eating disorder recognition, confronting the child, finding
the most effective treatment for patient and family, and evaluating
and insuring a timely recovery. A guide to eating disorder
prevention, this book is useful to parents, health professionals
and school personnel alike in countering the pervasive epidemic
of unhealthy eating and body image concerns, and destructive
media and peer influences. Her work can be reviewed further
at www.empoweredparents.com
/ www.empoweredkidZ.com
and www.treatingeatingdisorders.com
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